KYA KARU

Dhundta hu usko jo kabhi khoya hi nahi

Kuch jawab jinke sawal kabhi mile hi nahi

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Milta nahi, jata nahi, toot ta nahi tu mujhse kabhi

Teri pyaas kabhi lag gayi....

TO BATA MEI KYA KARU??

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Ye jazbat ankahe se hai

Ye jung anchidi si hai

Ye jung chid gayi,,,,,TO BATA MEI KYA KARU??

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Khamoshi tere gusse ki

Ye mit ti si nazakat teri aankho ki

In aankho mei doob jau.....TO BATA MEI KYA KARU??

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Padhta nahi, sunta nahi , dekhta nahi tu mujhe kabhi

Ek jhoota sachi nahi mai.

Ek khwab ban jau...TO BATA MEI KYA KARU??

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Likhta hu kuch is tarah

Dekhe tu mujhe jis tarah

Ek roti kalam ban jau....TO BATA MEI KYA KARU??

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Ye aakhiri hai paitra

Ye aakhri hai faisla

Phir bhi tu mujhe na mila...........TO BATA MEI KYA KARU???

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Dhundta hu usko jo kabhi khoya hi nahi

Kuch jawab jinke sawal kabhi mile hi nahi :(

Move on

Took you for granted

& now you are gone,

Pls baby listen to me

Can't you hold on??

Give me one chance

Let me explain

Don't give me that look

It makes me insane

Place your hand on my heart

Doesn't it beats for you?

Doesn't move on hurts?

I miss myself more than you

Bounded by pain, defined by suffering

Into the night come closer to me

Love me for a reason

Let the reson be LovE.

I can hear your echoes

They fade away quickly

I am trying hard

They just vainsh so quietly :(

Some part of you is in me

That your eyes don't see

it screams only one thing

That u already know

Took you for granted

& now you are gone

Pls baby listen to me

Can't you hold on??

Kuch is taraH

jalata hu khud ko kuch is tarah

ki mit jaye teri tasveer is dil se kisi tarah

hota hu choor madhushala mei is kuch is tarah

ki mit jaye teri pyas mujh se kisi tarah

kho jana chahta hu mei kuch is tarah

ki mit jaye teri yaad kisi tarah

baras na chahta hu kuch is tarah

tera daman bheeg jaye aansuo se kisi tarah

marna chahta hu kuch is tarah

ki teri saans bhi mehsus na ho kisi tarah

yaad mei jeena chahta hu kuch is tarah

roz mar kar bhi jee lun kisi tarah

jalata hu mei khud ko kuch is tarah. . . .

Touch my love

Why you don't see

You can touch my love it's free

Just pierce my heart right through with your eyes

It's nothing more than a boulevard of broken lies

Just a little dose of me

A little dose of me in your arms

A little more you can feel me in you

& then everything will be blue

Can you mend?

My world in the palm of your hand??

See me in the eye gal

We are moving apart

Keep trying dying

Till I'm outta sight

Something misses my heart

Somethings that got lost

Why you don't see

You can touch my love it's free

It was a game, you played it slow

Why you feel so low?

You are the winner I guess

& I'm in a complete mess

You heard it right, we are moving apart

You got it wrong we are together tonight

You thought you lost it and you were right

Outa darkness get some light

It's not what we call a breakup

Love left us

Why you can't see

We are moving apart

WHY YOU DON'T SEE ME?

yOU CAN TOUCH MY LOVE IT'S FREE

Mumbai asks why again??

I am the one that keeps you alive

I survived when no one survived

My never ending spirit, never ending resilience

& the will of fire that burnt all the time.

At one time it was 1993

& the indispensable screams

The palpable loss of loved ones

& my never fulfilled dreams.

Again I survived 2003

Again I survived 2006

& the mayhem of 2008. . .

I support the spirit of crowd in local trains

That kiss at nariman point

& never ending rain.

I still move on

& in the murkier memories of my past I still live on

Some abysmal experiences

That keep me holding on.

Why my dignity , respect a disdained thing

Why justice to those nefarious elements a forgotten thing??

I don't know what to say

B'cos this time it was a Wednesday

Why my pain always drains?

Why would I cry in vain

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& yes Mumbai asks why again??

MUMBAI ASKS WHY AGAIN????

Chahat

Meri chahat mei tu aabad sahi hai

Teri nafrat tu barbad sahi hai

Meri khudi khud kuch bhi nahi hai

Tere bin yun rehna ek anchaha khwab sahi hai

Tu is waqt ke pehlu mei simta lamha sahi hai

Ek roti hui kalam ka tu aansu sahi hai

Tu saawan mei bhatakte musafir ki pyas sahi hai

Galiyon mei der se aati dhoop ka lashkar sahi hai

Kinaro par doobti meri umeedo ki tu kashti nahi hai

Roz doobta hu jiske liye mei wo to jalpari nahi hai

Mere dard mei kahin na kahin tu mehfuz sahi hai

Bezubaan lafzo ki tu aawaz sahi hai

Mere pyar ki tu kashish nahi hai

Nafrat ki tu fitrat sahi hai

Tere dil ke dar par toot kar bikhra hua armaan sahi hai

Jise mei bahon mei na bhar paya wo adhura ehsaas sahi hai

Tu ek ek ansuni fariyad sahi hai

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Tu ek ansuni fariyad sahi hai

JO BHAGWAN SE BHI NA MILI WO TU BHEEK SAHI HAI

MERI CHAHAT MEI TU AABAD SAHI HAI

TERI NAFRAT MEI TU BARBAD SAHI HAI

Was lost somewhere...

Was lost sumwhere down in your thoughts

Felt as if loving you was a crime and I was caught

[Back then . . .when it all began]

If your love is a life spoiler

I would gladly like to be spoiled again

If it's a life saver

I would like to die again

I remember your unselfish love

& that kiss in the rain

Your silent sobs :(

& your sane reason to be insane

Cuddled into each other

I liked the way you caressed me

You liked the way I loved

I liked the way you smiled :)

[Then suddenly_____she called it quits]

It was all over, everything mute

In a fraction of second it was gone

u just. . .

broke the dreams before they were even sown

I realised ___

If your love is a life spoiler

I would gladly like to be spoiled again

If it's a life saver

I would like to die again

Y u went ?

Y u left ?

Y I was the one who wept ?

I have so many Y's to articulate

but It has so many U's to manipulate

My arms don't want to embrace you again

I will never cry your name in vain

Though your excuses were so lame

I would never fall in love that way again

You ruined my life

You went so abruptly

I love your sighs

& darkness that would grab me lately

I have only you to blame

My vengeance bleeds your name

Though it will kill my emotions

I will never be me again

Was lost sumwhere down in your thoughts

Felt as if loving you was a crime and I was caught

P.S

A drop of water startled me and I woke up. The rain smashed my face hard as if it were slashing

my tears that flowed out of bounds after all this but still. . .

Aks....

Kabhi apne aap ko shishe mei dekh leta hu

Apne aks se kuch puch leta hu..............(long pause and deep breath)

Zindagi wo nahi jo nanhe pau ke

roop mei ghar aa jati hai,

Zindagi wo nahi jo us waqt

sabko khushi de jati hai

Mera aks mujhe daant deta hai

zindagi ek bandgi(devotion) hai ye samjha deta hai

Mei bhi thoda has deta hun

Aaj khudse lad jata hu

ki tu khud ek tasawuur (imagination) ka ansh hai

mujhe tu kya zindagi samjhayega

zara si thokar se toot kar bikhar jayega

Mera aks phir mujhse ladta hai. . .

Thokar se toot kar bikhar jau to kya

toote hue har ek tukde tera roop dikha deta hun

mei tu toot kar bhi apni fitrat nahi badalta

tu ek baar toot kar to dekh

phir mujh par kya guzarta hai yeh mehsoos karke to dekh

Is sawaal ne mere andar ek tishnagi(thirst) si jaga di

tere sawaal ka jawab dene ki aag si laga di

Tabhi mera aks chilla uthta hai

kabhi ek kalam se likhi gayi

kavi ke dil ki aawaz hoti hai

kabhi apne liye kuch haasil karne ke aansuo mei hoti hai

kabhi kisi apne ki judai ki tadap mei hoti hai

kabhi. . . .

Mei phir se kuch bol deta hu...........

Zindagi jisko samajh aa gayi wo ek virla kaha hai

jo zindagi agar har kisi ko samajh aa gayi

wo zindagi ___zindagi kaha hai

tu kehta hai zindagi ek bandgi hai

to us bandgi ka aabid(worshipper)  kaha hai ??

Tu kyu zindagi samajhne ka takalluf karta hai

khud tera koi wajood nahi

mere astitva par vichar-vimarsh karta hai

rahi mere tootne ki baat to uski bhi baat sun___

Toot chuka tha mei jab wo chali gayi thi

pichle mahine ki 18 ko

sambhal kar rakha hai in tukdo ko

yakeen na ho to aazmale mujhe

har ek tukde par milega aks usi ka tujhe

Bata ab teri aur meri fitrat mei fark kya hai????

mera aks soch mei padh jata hai.

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Mere hue har tukde par hamesha usi ka aks milta hai

tere saamne jo aa jaye to tu usi ka ho jata hai

phir ek pal muskura kar soch mei padh jata hu

zindagi ke dastoor(rule) se lad jata hu

kabhi apne aap ko shishe mei dekh leta hun

Apne aks se kuch puch leta hu_____

Don't keep me holding on

Don't keep me holding on

To something that is already gone

To something that was never mine

To something that didn't went right

To something to which i clinged on

To something to which I placed my trust upon

I always skipped a beat when I saw you smile

Though we were together we were miles

Why your hate was so palpable

Why you always were my Archangel

If it's gone, let me know

If you are still there, then why I feel so low?

If you are playing, play it slow

If i was an option, then let me go

Why you act as you still need me

I'm not me anymore

Why you still care for me

I'm a priority such as before

SHOULD I remember what I shared?

SHOULD I articulate why I cared?

SHOULD I mention why our love cheated?

SHOULD I ask why my Angel cried?

SHOULD I HOLD ON or LET IT GO?

SHOULD I MOVE ON or LET LOVE GO?

Just answer please. . .

Don't keep me holding on

To something that is already gone___❤❤

Hims d heart breakr

There were times that I cherished

my love that I thought would never vanish

my hate was never so selfish

but somehow one day it all perished

Heart breaker's heart couldn't beat for u again

I got nothing for you to gain

why you recall my name in vain gal

my arms don't want to embrace you again

I'm just a shadow that you desired

I have got more than my share

I have seen the most murkier of times

sorry I couldn't make this one rhyme

Couldn't tolerate you anymore

my vengeance bleeds your name

Though it will kill my emotions in the end

I will never be the same 

Though you proved to be a pervert

you can't hurt heart breaker's heart 

I dont give it a damn anymore

HEART BREAKER WASN'T A heart breaker before..........♥♥

Aren't u mine

Aren't u tired gal

coz u have been running in my mind the whole time

Arent't u desperate for me as I am

cos u r the reason i m trying

Aren't u happy

cos u r d reason I spent nights blubbering

Aren't u drenched

cos u r the reason my feelings are draining

Aren't you just into me completely

cos u r the reason I feel like imploding

Aren't you a figment of my imagination

cos u r the reason I never saw sumone so charming

Aren't you smiling after reading this

Aren't u mine........:( ♥♥

Words you never said

Words you never said

hate that that i could never forget

somethings i couldnt express

emotions that you always suppressed

after all this tym spent with u

i m alone and depressed

you dont feel the same for me

that made me sometimes blue

if it was just a joke

then y the f*** u didnt give me a clue??

but now when i face the reality

i regret all those attempts i made

Words......

hate,,,,,

though u cried

i lied

i smiled wryly

& i was fined

it's been a long time

my hearts's visa is going to expire

though you could have it renewed

wish if my heart could be sued

now its too late

i m all screwed up

i m gone for ur good baby

feel sad for feelings that got shackled up

i am all finished

locked in a cage

u look me from outside

with a feeling of avenge on your face

i have made my arms open wide

waiting for you to strike

ma eyes are closed

just one more time if you could please say........

words u never said

hate that i could never forget

Na soch khafa hu tujhse. . .

na soch ki khafa hu tujhse

kaise samjhau juda hu mei khudse

kehne ko hum diljale nahi,

mei wo shisha hu jiski koi tasvir nahi,

mere hathon mei jivan ki lakir nahi,

baras jau badal ki tarah tujhpar aisi meri fitrat nahi..

mehfuz milunga tujhe teri tanhayi mei,

us raat ko aadhe khile chand aur us har ek aasu ki sachai mei..

dusro ke saamne teri muskurahat ki numaish mei,

raat ko leti karvatein or subah ki angrayi mei.

na soch,.....

kaise,,,,,,,,,

ab bhi bhagwan se kyu dua karti hai

ishq tera khuda mohabbat teri dua ye sachai kyu nahi swikar karti hai,

kyu hai tu meri parchayi ki pratima,

mujh jaise khuddar insaan se wafa ki chah karti hai.

chala gaya hu mei dur tujhse,

tujhe aur rula nahi sakta,

yun to tere pyar ki chaya,

is mukhbir musafir ko chaya de jaatai hai,

ye fizayen meri dushman hi sahi,

phir bhi teri hawa koi geet sa suna jaati hai.

haar gaya mei teri judai se

apne andar chalti aatma aur swayam ki ladai se,

jhukna to us jaan wale insaan ki pehchan hai,

warna akad mei rehna to ek murde ki sachai hai,

samjhiyo mat mujhe kabhi

chahe rahu mei dur tujhse

na soch ki khafa hu tujhse

kaise samjhau judaa hu mei khudse